Tuesday, September 4, 2018

Happy Tuesday my lovely readers! 

I hope y'all had a wonderful three day weekend! 

Today's post is going to be a Coffee Talk Tuesday! These are my favorite kind of posts because I can spill my feelings to y'all! And you kinda get to know me a little more. Let me know if you enjoy this series! 

These past few days have been so hard for me, I don't really know what triggered it, I just woke up one day and my emotions went downhill. I was cranky, sad, annoyed, and felt soo anxious. I've had multiple meltdowns, and I literally just sit on our bed and sob until there's just no more tears. I've been feeling like I'm not enough, I feel tired, I feel like I just can't catch a break, and honestly now that I'm feeling a little bit better, I look back and realize it's not that big of a deal, well most of it. 

And here's the thing, please don't bash me as a bad mom or think I don't love my son, he's my world, and I would kill and die for him, but sometimes I need a break from him. Julian and I have been inseparable since the day he was born, and I feel so lucky that his a mamas boy! But that's the thing, my husband could literally be sitting on the couch, and I'm in the restroom and Julian will find me just to open his snack, but he does that because he LOVES his mama. 

I'm grateful that he loves me so much, don't get me wrong please, I hope no one takes this the wrong way. These past few days I have been snapping at him and just not being a good mom, not giving him my best and I realized that it's because I need a break. Even if it's just an hour, I need to regain focus, and remind myself that it's okay to feel like this. 

I often feel guilty for asking my husband to takeover for a few hours because he works full time, he has to deal with some crazy stuff all day, and I know he gets home tired. Even on his days off I feel this guilt, because this is his time to unwind and clear his mind, you know? Don't get me wrong he helps me out tremendously but there's days that I need that extra hand and I feel too guilty to ask for it. 

I knew self care was important but since becoming a mom, I've realized that it's a HUGE part of your life, and you really need to take time for yourself. You can't give your family your best if you don't FEEL your best. I can only speak for myself but I don't think I've put myself first or made myself a priority since I found out I was pregnant. And yes I know that's what moms do, we put everyone before us and that's honestly what makes us so great and awesome lol, but is it okay to put ourselves at the top of the list at some point? 

Why is it that we ALWAYS feel like a "bad mom" when we ask for a break? We know we need it but it doesn't feel right because we have to cater to our babies. Why does it feel like going out for a Target run or coffee run ALONE, is such a bad thing. It might just be me, but I always feel like I'm abandoning Julian, like he knows I'm leaving for a couple of hours WITHOUT him because mama just needs a little alone time. 

What I'm basically saying and what I've learned is that you need to take care of yourself mama. IT'S OKAY to put yourself first, it might sound selfish to some but Lord knows if mama ain't happy no one is, it's like #MomLaw! Lol We're like the anchor that holds family together, and if that anchor is rusty and you know, it has seen better days, it's not doing much of holding, you know? Okay that probably made no sense but you know what I mean! 

So here's a few things you can do to have some "me" time....

1)Take some time to read your favorite book, which by the way do  people read anymore? I feel like everything is on like a podcast thing, audible? I think that's what it's called. 

2)Do your makeup, Lord knows I feel like a million bucks when I have my hair and makeup done, and even put on a cute outfit. Beyonce better watch out girlfriend! 

3)Enjoy nature! It's the little things! 

4)Exercise! Because A. It makes you feel soo good and B. because, how else are you suppose to keep up with a toddler? 

5)Take that Target run ALONE! Enjoy some piece and quiet, while you sip on some Starbucks and add things you don't need to your cart, and $200 later you feel so refreshed! haha 

I hope you enjoyed this personal post! Thank you so much for stopping by and for your support! It means the world to me!